Motherhood · Parenthood

Becoming A Mother 

For as long as I can remember I have wanted to be a mom. While growing up I would get asked what I wanted to do with my life and the only thing I felt passionate about was becoming a mother.   I also wanted to work with babies in some way but didn’t know what profession would allow me to do that. I went on to become an Orthodontic Assistant and actually enjoy(ed) it a lot. 

The first time I felt a huge maternal craving to have a baby was when I was around 21/22. I mentioned it to my husband who was my boyfriend at the time and he probably thought I was crazy. He reminded me that we were basically kids ourselves and it wasn’t the right time, and that was that. I totally knew what he meant and was glad he talked me through my baby fever. It never fully went away, but I became aware of our financial state and realized it wouldn’t be the experience I wanted if we went for it back then. 

When I was 25, it happened again. That baby fever crept up and was just nagging at me nonstop. I asked my husband when we could have a baby because I wanted it soooo badly. Again, he talked some sense into me. We were working crappy entry level jobs that barely made us any money. It was still not the ideal situation. This time, I cried. I NEEDED a baby in my womb. It’s insane how your body can crave something so badly when it has never even experienced it. 

It actually worked out well that we didn’t have a baby back then. We eventually uprooted and moved states, which was so hard in the beginning. Emotionally, and for our relationship. When we first moved, I was glad we didn’t have a child. Once we got back into the swing of life, our relationship was stronger than it had been in years, we were finally making good money and on the hunt for a house! 

A couple years later the prospect of having a baby came up, this time from my husband. Obviously I was overjoyed! We didn’t want to “try” to make a baby, instead we just let nature do it’s thing. After a couple months I decided I should focus on myself and work on getting rid of my horrible acne. I knew I couldn’t get pregnant while taking the medication, but waiting another 6 months felt worth it to me in the long run. Once I ran out of my prescription, the “baby making” continued. 

I was 3 months away from turning 28 when I found out I was pregnant. We owned a house, had good jobs, and made good money. It all came together at just the right time. I’m glad we “waited” to have a baby. I’m thankful for the 9 years we had together without a baby. I don’t think we would be where we are today if we had a baby when I first got that huge case of Baby Fever. 

When I told Thomas I was pregnant, I had an Amazon box waiting for him to get home with these things inside. I found out on a day he had to work and I was off. 

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9 thoughts on “Becoming A Mother 

  1. Just stumbled across your blog and I LOVE IT, it’s like a glimpse into my own future (my blog is about being 25 and being SO READY to have a baby sooo yeah, I get what you were feeling.) Loved this post, looking forward to reading more!

    Liked by 1 person

  2. I remember when you told me! And I remember all the years you had baby fever. It’s so hard to wait. Brett made me wait to have Benji until he had a better job and until we had a house too. It was sooo hard but worth it! Babies are worth the wait!

    Liked by 1 person

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